Rainbow Trout

Five years after you died our daughter and I got rainbow trout tattoos, But scarification would ring more true. A slash, running diagonally from under my right eye, over the check, the edge of the mouth, crooking the smile, for me.

For our daughter, "cut here" perforation dashes, simple and elegant, around her heart.

We marked the death anniversary by marking ourselves. We designed the fish. We held each other’s hands As the serious needle, stabbed in and out

Pointillism, deep jewel tone colors. We each felt nauseaus, felt burned, Needed to obtain your nirvana fish.

Though we hated when you went fishing Or studied topographical maps Or looked up which flies were hitting, And then made your own, with bits of feather and silk thread.Your fishing took you away from us, before you were taken away from us.

Now we carry fish on our backs Flopped over our right shoulders, reminding us,so that when I see men who look like you I don't cross the street, pointing, saying, “There you are! How dare you? How dare you?”